SELF-HARM
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I'm not trying to tell anyone anything with this blog. I'm not trying to make people feel and think anything in particular. I just write my thoughts down, take from it whatever you like. Read it in a way that does good for you, because at the end of the day It's not my responsibility to control how you interpret what I say.

I read every 'ask' you guys send me, sometimes it just takes a bit of time replying, and I tend to reply directly to your ask.

I believe no matter what you do, change is inevitable, you can either make the best or the worst of a situation. Sometimes my posts get a little Captain Depresso-ish, and I apologize in advance for it. I do honestly believe absolutely everything has a positive side, it’s just sometimes I struggle to see it.

Just 'cause we're down, doesn't mean we gotta stay there!
- The Wonder Years -

AS OF JUNE 11TH 2011
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The thoughts never completely leave, but there are times when they’re easier to handle, times when you feel okay, and even though the temptation is there you know you don’t need it.

Telling someone you self-harm and having them respond with, ‘but everyone loves you? like everyone I know loves you!’ and accepting right then and there that they’ll never understand you. 
There’s a sense of relief in cutting knowing tomorrow may never come, and a feeling of freedom realizing that if it does you can always slice yourself back to feeling alright.
I thought I deleted this, but I clearly haven’t.

I’ve decided I’ll still use this, just very very occasionally. 
Will be deactivating this tumblr.

If you like you can ask for the url to my other tumblr.
I desperately want to self-harm, but I’m just too tired. I’m physical too exhausted and it’s just making me feel a whole heap worse.
I’m not ready to die.

I’ve always been nice to people, and I can honestly say it’s always paid off. I have far too many friends, and I’ve never ever faced hate in my life. I think it’s just because I’m nice. Being myself has never failed me. I’m a weird fuck and I know it, I think people respect that though, because I never changed. I’ve struggled with depression and self-harm all though high school. I keep it under the hood though. I only have two friends that know. I go out and I do silly things that make great stories. Doing funny things just because I can. Living life hard and fast. If I could get my head around my self-harm and wanting to kill myself I’d be so fucking pristine. It’s never been so bad, but so good at the same time. This time it’s hitting hard, but I finally have two friends I can lean on and it feels fucking great. I think I’ll be okay. 
Refusing to let someone check you for cuts isn’t always because you’re guilty, sometimes it’s a principle thing.

Have a little faith in me, please.

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